Rules of Engagement

1. If you want to ruin their day, do not let them ruin yours.

2. Do not let them control you with your very own anger and frustration.

3. Their motivation is power and their method is the abuse of it to control you, similar to rapists or child molesters.

4. Do not become an actor or participant in their play (or street theater).

5. Pretend you are part of the audience; simple observe and make mental notes, and/or take pictures. There is nothing like physical evidence with a date and time stamp on it.

6. Only become a cast member when you are seen as clearly the victim and they the attackers.

7. They will always be in the wrong: feigning stupidity; ill mannered and disrespectful; baiting and provoking; driving aggressively while imitating road rage; walking on the wrong side of the hall; opening doors in your face; racing around blind corners; barging into elevators; meeting you in the bathroom is a favorite; stalking you with company security; sneaking up behind you; and the ever present coucher and throat clearer. Basic symptoms of passive aggressive personalities (whose clinical outcome is not a cheery one).

8. Never, ever be the aggressor, either at work, in public places or the highway! They are provocateurs enticing you to behave badly or break the law. Don't let them provoke you! If you don't, you will help to ruin their day.

9. If you watch long enough you will begin to learn their playbook and anticipate their moves, which should help lower your anxiety, frustration, anger and blood pressure.

10. Never, ever assume. Always be sure you know the answer before you ask and then do not react!

11. Your lack of reaction and decreased levels of anxiety, frustration, anger and blood pressure will help to ruin their day.

12. Remember, most of them are hyperactive, so expect them to keep coming at you, they will, because they cannot control themselves. They need to control you for the psychic high they are addicted too.

To orient yourself to what they are up to, watch the movie "Gas Light" with Ingrid Bergman and Joseph Cotton or read an Internet review of the film. Just don't expect Joseph Cotton's character to show up in your movie. If you want to get to know them better, search on "forensic psychology" and "psychopaths". A note of caution, psychopaths normally do not respond to therapy, in fact, the symptoms usually worsen under treatment. Thus, a good case can be made for their remorselessness and persistence.

Consider this ... if you are an extrovert, they are not great folks because they are more extroverted than you are, they talk too much, there is a reason for that and it is not good. They talk to you to gain your confidence and manipulate you. They talk to you to find out what rattles your cage, what pushes your buttons. They talk to you to find the strings that can be used to control you.

Helpful hints ...

1. Do not loose your job no matter what the level of harassment.

2. You are extremely vulnerable without financial means, DO NOT LOSE IT. See #8 above.

3. Remember, your employer is under federal mandate to provide you a safe and harassment free workplace without discrimination. Document attacks in extreme detail. There are workplace harassment attorneys who could be of assistance.

4. Expect them at your place of worship. They wouldn't miss it to save their souls. Do not let them keep you from Him, no matter what they do.

5. Tell everyone at your place of worship about your being a stalking target, they should be the most thoughtful, caring, forgiving and understanding people you know, right

6. Whenever I speak with people I always refer to the book, Terrorist Stalking in America, by David Lawson, because "it corroborates the experiences of my wife and I". Purchase a copy, it's worth it and because it took a lot of courage to write, publish and distribute.

7. If you can afford to, insure everything. They will do property damage when the usual stuff isn't working.

8. Buy extended vehicle warranties. They will damage your means of transportation to make you vulnerable to their control.

9. Make sure the restaurant bill or bar tab is yours and that it is correct.

10. Be sure your discount or coupons have been properly credited on your invoice.

11. Be sure the credit card they return to you has your name on it.

12. Be sure EVERYTHING you purchased is in your bag, not in the cart, or next to the register, before you leave the checkout area.

13. Be sure the cap on the bleach bottle is on tightly and the bottle is not leaking.

14. Be sure the bag of kitty litter or potting soil is not leaking.

15. Do not leave your lawn mower gas can next to the pump while you go inside to pay first.

16. Do not allow the bag boy to slam the truck lid or close any car doors.

17. Make sure the repaired product is repaired before you leave the shop.

18. Do not switch cell phone providers or any service provider without first confirming service with your new provider.

19. Remember, when a play is in progress and it's to your advantage feign stupidity, forget and say you're sorry. Always, always do it with a smile. Defuse the situation.

When on the road ...

1. It is critically important that you ONLY WATCH THE ROAD MOVIE (never participate) as your vehicle, life and driving privilege are at stake.

2. Never, ever be impatient. When you get antsy they'll git cha'.

3. If you are lost slow down even more and be careful.

4. Your objective is not to out drive them, you can't. Your objective is to not let them make you do something stupid.

5. They use visual cues and distraction to perfection, especially in school zones and at intersections. Walking kids from behind school buses is a favorite.

6. Watch for jaywalkers at the most inconvenient place and time especially at night. Naturally, no one uses the sidewalks, especially at night. Not bike riders or even moms with baby carriages.

7. When you make a right turn ALWAYS turn into the curb lane, and ALWAYS LOOK FOR grandma and grandpa, Mom with baby, the little girl or asylum escapee in the crosswalk BEFORE YOU TURN.

8. When you make a left turn always yield the right of way to oncoming traffic (they will hide a straggler in the curb lane behind another car, bus or truck) AND look for a trap ready to close after you complete the turn. If you can wait for the trap to clear, do so. DO NOT become an actor in their play.

9. Avoid left hand turns at intersections without left turn signals. Never, ever make a left turn if you cannot see what's coming. If they pull an SUV, truck or school bus into the left turn lane across from you WAIT for them to clear. Let them blow their horns behind you. It's their mess, make them clean it up.

10. During any and all driving conundrums, always remember that, IT'S THEIR MESS, WAIT FOR THEM TO CLEAN IT UP. If its reckless endangerment, using a vehicle as a deadly weapon to threaten bodily injury, a window tint offense, etc. get out your camera. If they go berserk, use your cell to call 911 and report a road rage incident. Road rage is against the law.

11. Keep a flat tire inflation device, flashlight and full water jug in your trunk.

12. Be sure the too friendly traffic cop returns your license, registration, proof of insurance and be sure he really did include the citation you just signed. Never smart off to him! If appropriate, let your lawyer do your talking for you, at a time and place of his choosing.

13. Expect police and/or highway patrol sightings if you are guilty of having been recently uppity. EMS and fire departments are the second team in this game of misconduct, intimidation and blame shifting. Geez, considering all the law enforcement presence, the rational person would reasonably expect the harassment to lessen. Dash?

14. Get the name of everyone you talk to on the phone, especially the 911 operator and the police dispatcher. Many communities have citizen police oversight boards. This is happening to you because, in many instances, members of law enforcement are betraying their public trust, disobeying their oath and abusing their authority. Read Serpico.

Please let's not get into it. How much communication must go on between the stalkers to produce the perfectly timed threat events directed at you and/or your wife on a daily basis? Whole bunches times two! Cell phones, short wave, satellite phones, lookouts, rehearsals, etc. In the year 2005, are we to believe that law enforcement is powerless to intercept the chatter of this criminal conspiracy or observe any of it? Even when they are, at times, in the parade lap? Come on! How did they put Gotti away? Please, let's just not get into it.


- Submitted Anonymously